all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
