Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize