If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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