I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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