I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
