If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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