Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize