Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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