Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
