Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I love having hate sex.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
