i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
