people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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