it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
