at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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