Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
