You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
