It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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