i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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