I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
