Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize