please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
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His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
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all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone