You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
i think i just lost a toe
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
