I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
