What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
