But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize