hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
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I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
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They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.