What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
As shirtless as possible
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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