what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
