Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
