i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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