I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
