Nicole vs. Life
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
