So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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