I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
