sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
The power of my boobs compel you
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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