Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize