Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
