Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Randomize