just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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