I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
