My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
