the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
