Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Randomize
