And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
The police scanner is talking about you again....
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
