i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
