Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
