He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize