I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
