oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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