You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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