I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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